20 Ekim 2018, Cumartesi
saat: 04:59
I’m tired of thinking about the tasks I should have completed yesterday. I am so slow & methodical with nearly everything I care about, including my work (but good at what I do), & that (annoyingly) won't change, but I have always wished to be fast AND good. Will that ever happen?
It is currently so peaceful right now in my apartment as I sit here drinking my glass of wine, as the cat sleeps on my lap. True, life never does fall into order itself & without action, but one can instead make it do so. What was that quote? “Forgive yourself each night, recommit every morning”?
But for now she need not think of anybody. She could be herself, by herself. And that was what now she often felt the need of---to think; well not even to think. To be silent; to be alone. All the being and the doing, expansive, glittering, vocal, evaporated; and one shrunk, with a sense of solemnity, to being oneself, a wedge-shaped core of darkness, something invisible to others.
(Virginia Woolf, To the Lighthouse)
First thing is first though, I have to get some rest. I’m just so tired that I’ll save nostalgia for tomorrow.
