07 Kasım 2011, Pazartesi
![]() saat: 02:54
![]() it reminded me of how good i have it, really. he is right. absolutely. it's scary. but then you can't just let yourself brought down by all the crap. i was afraid of losing him. i clung to the idea so much, tried hard not to ruffle any feathers. smooth sailing was the goal. i could not let go for a long time because that could mean i would lose him for good. i refused to see the ways it didn't work. and then i did. i lost him, or more so the idea of us together and guess what? i survived. it's fine. i can let go now. i knew that letting go was always the better choice, and now i get to experience it. i survived the loss, and as a result, became a better, stronger person. i finally decorated my room, having moved in three months ago. the housewarming should happen in six months or so. harm aversion theory of depression. voxel-based morphometry. light-therapy with melatonin. "i want to start treatment as soon as possible." grief. it's all getting so meta. that's what he would say. | ||
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